What Borderline is not

Why its' not Bipolar Disorder:

Unlike Bipolar Disorder, an Emotionally Unstable or Borderline person
doesn't switch between different mood periods, being deliriously happy
for a while only to be followed by a deeply depressed episode.
A Borderline person is constantly feeling every single emotion, to at least 50-60%,
but it doesn't take much - or long - for us to feel any of them 100%.
We can freak out, throw a tantrum or break down crying at a drop of a hat
because we are always in-tuned with every single freakin' emotion, all the time.

Most of us understand that this is incredibly hard on anyone close to us
and we are constantly terrified to be rejected for it. We are deeply ashamed.
If we could control or even regulate our emotions we would, I promise you.

Why it's not Dissociative disorder, Schizophrenia or a Psychosis:

A Borderline person does not hallucinate, visually or auditory.
 Because of the constant acute pain we feel we are definitely self-involved,
but we actually understand pretty well how people and the world works.
We may have complex and skewed ideas about ourselves, emotions and relationships
but we don't hear voices, think we are Napoleon or have alternate personalities.

The fact that doctors called our disorder "borderline between a mental
and a mood disorder" for a long time is not helping our struggle for a diagnosis.

Why it's not Autism, Asbergers, ADHD or OCD:

Borderline people often have multiple diagnoses, this is true, but nothing
in a straight Borderline diagnosis gives you things like a jumbled mind, phobias,
dyslexia, a hard time to focus or to sit still. We have very busy minds and emotional lives
but they usually come with high intuition and sensitivity, a strong ability to read and analyze
other people's states of mind, and - sometimes - the ability to manipulate others.

Doctors often give us the wrong diagnosis because there are drugs to prescribe
to most other disorders (even if they don't work alot of the time), whereas many
consider Borderline a life sentence -  and debate on whether to even tell the patient (!)

Why it's not (only) Major Depression:

Yes, most people with Borderline also suffer from MDD - how could you not?
Just managing to put one foot in front of the other can sometimes seem like
an impossible task. We doubt and hate ourselves like you have never
experienced, we have an emptiness deeper than you can imagine,
and a pain and a fear you wouldn't wish on your worst enemy.
But - we don't really have the apathy, the flat-line of the clinically depressed.

Somehow we always have some crazy energy left in us, making our suicide rate
much higher than people who are "only" Depressed. But, most of us never get a diagnosis.

Why it's not (really) Insomnia, an Eating Disorder, Self-harm,
Alcoholism or a Drug Addiction:

Because none of these came first. They are symptoms of the disease.
You cannot focus on a secondary issue - that is sometimes the only thing
that is keeping us from drowning - while not even touching on the primary issue.
So please stop judging us.


11 kommentarer:

  1. Yes, the term "borderline" is not at all helpful, is it.

  2. Är så bekymrad över ett av mina bonus barn som jag känner att det är något vajsing med men jag vet inte vad det är annat än en del i personligheten. Man känner sig maktlös som styvförälder. Har du svårt för ironi eller vanligt flams? Hon kan bli jättearg över sådant. Det är annat också som jag hade tänkt att skriva men suddade ut det för att inte hänga ut någon. Det är bra att du skriver om detta. Det finns så mycket fördomar och okunskap. Vi behöver lära oss mer och det är ju mitt inlägg bevis på

  3. I think people - and even some therapists - gather anything and everything in the Borderline diagnosis. Some people are labelled as such without much evidence, and people who actually have the disorder are labelled otherwise.

  4. I'm with Debra on this one: "the term 'borderline' is not at all helpful" at all. You'd think someone would come up with something better, a term that would describe an emotional roulette that keeps no rules but its own and when it wants to.

    If you were to name the disorder, what would you call it?

    1. I think I'd call it "Daily problems are a drama to me". LOL

    2. I think a phrase K uses a lot might apply: The I Feel Everything and I Feel It Damn Hard Disorder (IFEIFIDH)... Even the acronym hurts.

  5. This is a wonderful explanation! I'm really glad that you did it because even I haven't looked this much into it. I just kind of took it. Not even my doctor told me I had it, I had to hear about it through a disability hearing. I think for awhile, I was a little bit in denial.

  6. No alternate personalities? Awww, that sounds kinda lonely to us (me and the insomniac). ;)

  7. Depression and related illnesses are hard enough, it sucks being so hard to treat! Sending hugs!

  8. I would never judge!!!! I just pray, that everyone has someone close to truly talk to and the person, that they are talking to, doesn't judge them! It's so hard! Sending Big Hugs!


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