Am I just eating because I'm bored?

I don't know what I'm feeling right now. Ok, I do know what I'm feeling,
but it's just too many different things all kerbobbled in to one tired mess today.
To steal some words from a fellow blogger: I'm in a funk. It was all well and good
(again: Ok, it wasn't really) until I woke up this morning with a heavy head
and rain against the window. Rain equals fewer sales equals bored at work
equals me hunched over the computer for most of the day eating lots of junk.

I'm sure I had a point when I began this rant, but it's lost to me now...

Actually, when I think about it, most of my life I have been in a funk.
That's what a life long depression will do to you. Funkiness.
It just feels extra crappy when one has no money, one's house is a dirty mess
and one's future, in more than one way, is uncertain because of outside factors
one cannot influence. There is a profound sense of discontentment - with everything.
 The ideal would be this leading to a restlessness that then spurts creativity,
but without any energy instead one just grows sad and apathetic (and pathetic).


18 kommentarer:

  1. I certainly empathize with this kind of perpetual funk. It's not easy when your home is in disarray and there is such little money to go around-- but that does not make you pathetic. I prefer to see it as conscientious, and if you were able, you would change it.

    I'm afraid I can't offer much consolation when I myself am struggling with such emotions, but I can offer you my hopes that your own situation finds light soon.

    1. Thank you, I hope both of our situations improve soon.

  2. :/ Yea, know well the funk. I hope that yours lifts soonest!

  3. I struggle quite often with the "funk". Me and the funk--we are tight. We know each other's buttons, and press them often.

    I take umbrage at you using "pathetic" as an adjective for yourself, like Madame Mortem. You are not pathetic. You are dealing with emotional issues and demons. That takes a lot of energy. People tend to forget that exercising your mind takes as much as moving your body. Fatigue sets in and before you know it, you're on the couch watch a trash-tv marathon or just the same movie over and over and over because it is too much to change the tape.

    I hope it gets a little better for you soon (at the very least).

    ::Internet Hugs::


    1. "Umbrage" - what a great word. And I totally watch the same Buffy episodes over and over because I can't be bothered changing the dvd!

  4. Jag känner så väl igen mig i din text, det är inte lätt att komma ur när man mår sådär.

    1. Nej, det finna ingen patenterad lösning direkt :(

  5. I can absolutely relate to your mood and feeling, but oh, come on, it doesn't make you or your situation pathetic! Everyone has bad day and even worse days when she feels down, but I'm sure you'll get over it and feel better soon. ^^

  6. This is going around. I, too, read the funk post. And then I read another about a friend who has been in her cave for a while. Sometimes, I need Magaly Time. If I don't get it, I can be quite... uncomfortable to be around. Then I'm me again. Hope you're you again soon.

    Sends geeky jokes and friendly hugs.

    1. How I wish I had a cave. I could definitely use some alone time right now.

    2. I hope all is getting better. I was thinking about you and your funk, last night. And because the blues like laughter are contagious, I found myself thinking about my little brother. I think this Father's Day will be extra hard on me. We had made plans for it... Maybe I should write a story of what we might have done. Don't know yet...

    3. I'm sorry for your loss Magaly, I know it must still feel like a gaping hole in your chest at times. I lost my best friend 5 years ago and I still think about her almost every day.
      Maybe you can make some nice plans with your Pianoman and his Princess tomorrow?

  7. I hate to hear that a depression has rested upon your shoulders.
    I too feel this way often and totally sympathise.
    Such greats as E A Poe, Charles Dickens and Sylvia Plath wrote some of their best work while in a funk.

    Get the quill, ink and parchment out my dear! : )

    I hope you feel better soon x

    1. Thank you. I wish I had the energy to take out anything creative, but I've worked 6 days this week and I'm wearing thin :(

  8. By the way - I love reading your blog,
    so have awarded you the Liebster Award.



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